BUILDING A LIFE OF MEANING, ONE DELIBERATE STEP AT A TIME
Captured by the talented Mitchell Royel amidst the vibrant pulse of the Fashion District yesterday—this moment radiates pure energy and unfiltered emotion. Set to the dynamic soundtrack of "WATER" by KREAM & ZOHARA, the scene is a seamless fusion of movement and melody. The rhythm carries a powerful momentum, channeling the boundless spirit of the waves.
Years ago, I covered the “Lemonade Issue” of ELIXIR by Royel, something that captured my imagination at the time. Little did I know that the magazine would later be rebranded as Bennett & Monroe, but some things haven’t changed for me since then. One of those enduring principles is a simple yet powerful truth that I try to live by every day—to strive harder, focus on improvement, and direct my energy toward the things I can control.
The concept of the "locus of control" is foundational, not just in work or creative projects, but in every aspect of life. It’s the realization that worrying about what’s beyond your sphere of influence accomplishes nothing, while dedicating yourself to what you can actually impact can yield growth and meaningful progress. This approach applies to everything—whether you're chasing your dreams, building a career, nurturing relationships, or pursuing deeply personal goals. The challenges you face in life often become less daunting when you zero in on what’s within your reach to change. This mindset has been a grounding force for me, reminding me to stay focused amid external distractions or pressures.
This principle is equally relevant in personal relationships, romantic or otherwise. For instance, if you’re someone looking to marry the partner of your dreams, it’s important to focus on the qualities and values you bring to a relationship rather than obsessing over how the other person might perceive you. Authenticity, growth, and kindness are things you can control—and they significantly contribute to the foundation of a lasting connection. For women, this truth resonates just as much. Navigating life, relationships, and careers successfully hinges on self-respect and focusing on personal development. The idea isn't to force outcomes but to create the right conditions for positive results to emerge naturally.
Life, at its core, is about staying true to yourself—your goals, your values, and your convictions. It’s about prioritizing the essentials while filtering out the noise. This doesn’t mean you will—or should—ignore feedback or external insights. It means discerning which external factors are constructive and worth addressing versus the countless distractions that serve no meaningful purpose in your life. Keeping a clear head and focusing your efforts in the right direction is vital for long-term satisfaction and growth.
While the world shifts and evolves around us, some principles are timeless. They serve as anchors, helping us remain steady when the seas of life turn turbulent. And for me, the concept of focusing on what’s within my control is one of those bedrock ideals. Whether crafting words for a feature, chasing dreams, or navigating relationships, this philosophy shapes every choice I make. It’s not always easy—distractions, doubts, and fears creep in from time to time. But the more I remind myself of this principle, the more I find clarity in both my intentions and actions.
In the years since covering The Lemonade Issue, this principle has become ingrained in how I approach life. And it’s reassuring to see its relevance hold true across different contexts—professional growth, personal interactions, and even the unpredictable curveballs that life inevitably throws your way. It’s a constant reminder that success, happiness, and fulfillment rarely come from instantaneous leaps. Instead, they are the cumulative result of countless small, intentional actions—all rooted in focusing on what you can personally influence.
Ultimately, living life aligned with your values and goals doesn’t just happen overnight. It requires effort, self-awareness, and, at times, patience. But that’s the beauty of it—the ability to work toward your best self, one deliberate step at a time. I’ve learned that as long as you keep striving—putting in the work while making peace with what lies beyond your grasp—you’ll find yourself in a position to achieve the things that matter most to you. Whether that’s pursuing a dream, building a family, or just creating a life of meaning and purpose, the path forward begins with what you do today. Focus on what you can control, and the rest will follow.
-Nic Von Rupp
Epilogue: The ocean has always been a vast and unpredictable canvas where legends are written in salt and spray. It is here, under the towering shadow of mountains made of water, that humanity's deepest fears and highest ambitions collide. Big wave surfing, both art and defiance, is not merely a sport—it’s a philosophy shaped by centuries of stories, challenges, and an unwavering commitment to presence. From the towering swells of Nazare to the tropical giants of Jaws in Maui, the pioneers of this discipline have danced on the precipice of chaos, harnessing the immense power of nature while fully surrendering to it.
For the big wave surfer, the mindset is one of total acceptance. There are no guarantees when you paddle out into these unforgiving waters—no certainty of catching the wave, no assurance of returning to shore unharmed. It is the ultimate act of mindfulness, where each decision must be precise and every ounce of fear must be funneled into focus. They are not in battle with the sea but in communion with it, moving in tandem with forces beyond human comprehension.
There’s a universal truth to this way of life that stretches far beyond the tropical horizons where these waves form. It’s a shared understanding among those who face the seemingly insurmountable—that surrendering to the moment, while refining your skill and daring to trust the process, is the only way forward. Their tales are whispered in hushed reverence from generation to generation, carrying the essence of something timeless and unyielding. Like the towering waves they ride, their spirit rises and falls, only to surge again, indomitably.